Why BB4TheLord2

Why BB4TheLord2: My first blog, bb4thelord.blogspot.com was began a couple years after I became a young widow. After ten years on that journey of widowhood, I took a break from blogging. Now the time has come to begin again. Writing is a gift God has given me and I must get back into using the gifts God has given me.

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

Rebuilding I: With a Sword by My Side


There is a story I read the boys when they were little. Not sure of the title, but we remember the theme, "No, no, don't go, to the plain of Ono!" It was a child's rendition of Nehemiah and his struggles with rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem. At one point, the enemies ask to speak to him in the plain of Ono. Nehemiah doesn't go. The work he is doing is too important. The enemies tried many tactics: lying, distraction, threats, and flat out planning an assault.


Nehemiah and his people had a mind to work, despite the threat of attack. They built and restored the walls all the while with a sword by their side. That is where I am at. The Lord is restoring me. Rebuilding me. But the enemy is attacking. He is speaking sly words. He is trying to manipulate me. To get me to stop the work that is being done. He attacks with sharp accusations and fears.


"...in the evil day, and having done all, to stand." I am doing my best to stand. To run to His Word, my sword, claiming promises. Mediating on His Word and reading it more frequently and in larger chunks. I know this level of attack is only for a season. Yet it is exhausting fighting off the repeated bombardments of the enemy. Being constantly on guard, I feel like a vet with PTSD. Always in that heightened state of alertness. Most of the battle is within me. In my mind & in my heart.


Like the old hymn says:
Prone to wonder, Lord, I feel it,
prone to leave this God I love.
Take my heart, oh, take and
seal it, seal it for Thy courts above.


And so I slipped my grandmother's silver heart pendent onto my necklace. Yes, Lord, into Your hands I place my heart. This restoration work is Yours. This battle is Yours too. I hid once again in Him.

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